I was feeling blocked.Honestly speaking, I have been feeling stuck in writing this blog, these newsletters. They for me, have felt flat, predictable, repetitive, boring and somewhat lifeless for me. I have been writing them for 7 + years. I realize that some of you disagree and I thank you for your constant feedback and encouragement, but for me, and my creative process- they have felt more stagnant than fluid as of late and I have felt boxed in.
Sure I can blame it on being busy, modern day distractions– and all that may be true, but really when it comes down to it– a new level of honesty and self-expression for me, is yearning to find the light of day.
The old model of trust, how we trust ourselves, each other, our creative process, life–is shifting into something new. I can feel it.
A new level of honesty, truth and self-expression is being born.
I became aware that I was holding up some ideal model of who I thought YOU wanted me to be. Who I thought I wanted to be, needed to be, in order to gain your trust, inspiration and approval so I could have the privilege of inspiring you to create life on your own terms, transmute your passion into action by the fuel of your authentic expression. (my soul’s purpose)
This limited belief in my own thinking, honestly, was blocking my own authentic expression–my joy. It was keeping me from being fully vulnerable and transparent about what was really going on for me.
So sitting on a plane here, flying back to Texas from Martha’s Vineyard to care for my mother post foot surgery, it all came flooding into consciousness for me.
I have been stuck with my writing and in my own mind.
When we are stuck there is usually some level of truth and honesty that is begging to surface and some limited belief that is holding us back.
I realized these newsletters have felt stuck because I am holding back my own truth and have been writing from the voice of one who was playing it safe. Once I started to write this everything flowed, it is if the flood gates were open and the letters were free again to dance on the page in full flow and liberation.
So here is the truth that is bubbling up for me, in the vortex of my own creative life design: I have decided to move to Martha’s Vineyard, full-time for now, to write my novel, teach, mentor and create a home base on the island. I will still call Austin home too, but right now, the island is calling me.
I am so grateful that I have created a flexible business model, based on my soul’s purpose and passion doing what I love that supports my lifestyle AND my calling to be of service.
Is this something you are wanting too? <If so…join us in January for
Here is my new home on the lagoon on Martha’s Vineyard- for now (view from the cottage above).
Leaping is required to fly.
You can’t only leap once! Of course as with any transition and creative journey, we must face our fears and take a leap! I don’t have it all figured out. I don’t know exactly what it is going to look like…there are a lot of unknowns. I am swimming in uncertainty and rather than sinking I am choosing to open up to the mystery and adventure of it all.
- What I do I know is that this where the real growth happens. This is where we learn to trust, miracles occur and dreams realize.
- What I do know is that my vision is calling me forward and that it is undeniable, and this I have learned to trust deeply. Leap after leap.
- What I do know is that my soul is calling me to the island, my creative and spiritual home for deep nourishment and inspiration.
While on the island, the leaves and the waves and the birds in the trees have all been whispering to me pages of this book. I need to write this story. My story– my story of the island.
I do believe in soul-mates of various kinds and I also believe that certain places act like soul-mates too. Martha’s Vineyard in many ways is one of my soul-mates. No other place in this planet has support me, inspired me and catalyzed my full self-expression and joy like this island. It is purity and magic… and the connection I feel when there is a potent lifeline of creativity and miracles.
One thing I know is that rational thinking is only one part of the equation, this must come from the heart knowing. I must answer this call and walk boldly, confidently, towards the dark void of the blank white canvas and see what, life– like a painting, a book—this canvas, this chapter– has to tell me. It is writing and painting itself and I know I am the steward of its great reveals.
And now that I have fully committed to this vision, the whole world is conspiring to support me in living it. I feel totally supported. But first I had to leap into the unknown.
This is the true joy in life, to answer the call of the soul. If not now, when?
Where can you be more honest and truthful with yourself and others?
What is your soul yearning for?
Are you willing to take the journey live your true joy?
If so, join myself and Pam Simich January 2015 (program starts on the 30th) to answer that call with inspiration, structure, accountability, tools and support so you may…
- Make peace with your past
- Discover your soul’s purpose
- Ignite your vision into action
….in a sacred creative community that will guide you to rise into your greatest life.
Are You Ready to Rise and Fly Like the Phoenix?
Act now, and take the journey of the Rising Phoenix of your full potential, with passion and practicality. Let go of your past. Claim your Future and receive the structure the guidance and support to live it boldly, with an intimate group in a solid framework that will launch you in the flight of your best life!
with love
and creative expansion,
